Every Super Bowl party has that one annoying person who shows up with something healthy and this year, I was that girl. Or at least that’s what I was worried about, until everyone dove into the buffalo cauliflower bites. “These are a vegetarian’s dream,” Haley, my friend Brooke’s niece, said. Relief! She was ecstatic because like me, she doesn’t eat meat, but the smell and allure of buffalo wings —  especially piled high on a platter on Super Bowl Sunday — can really mess with your senses.

Enter these buffalo cauliflower bites, which will satisfy all those cravings. They’re soft, easy to pick up and shovel in, and of course nice and spicy, too. Even better? They’re not messy and tough to eat like buffalo wings.

I first spotted these dazzlers on my younger brother’s instagram feed when he whipped ’em up for his girlfriend. I asked him for the recipe and… voila. He even gave me an alternative for the usual blue cheese dipping sauce — Greek yogurt! (I added some mustard powder and wasabi powder to kick it up a bit, and it was perfect.) Super Bowl might not be for another year, so perhaps you can whip ’em up for a President’s Day gathering tonight… or to finish your House of Cards binge this coming weekend.

If you know me, you know I love me some football; it’s one of the only beautiful things about summer being over. There’s also something really calming about getting back into the routine: cooking dinner for B (then blogging about it!), and watching the game together on the couch. What a game it was, too. My boys really kicked off the season in style the other night. Before I knew what kind of romping it would be — okay, fine 33-27 isn’t as much a romping as it felt like — I was planning a winning menu of my own.

I wanted a healthier version of a tailgate: something hearty and fried, but that wouldn’t leave me feeling sacked on the couch. Enter Gwyneth Paltrow’s gluten-free old bay fish fingers for kids (from her It’s All Good cookbook, which I’ve cooked from before). Inspired by those, I made these spicy mustard fluke fingers. Use as much sriracha as you like in the mustard mixture (I used a ton) and then whip up a little dipping sauce with it too (sriracha + vegenaise = heaven). It only takes about 15 minutes — prep and cook time, combined.

They taste just like fried chicken fingers you’d get at the stadium, but without any of the guilt. I’d say less noise too, but we get pretty into the games around here. Serve ’em with a side of broccoli like I did, or any vegetable or salad really — and even try ’em out on your kids too. I bet if you tell them it’s chicken, they’d never know the difference. It’s like running your very own play-action in the kitchen.

B knew it was fluke, and he loved it anyway. He asked if I could please add these to the regular TV Dinner repertoire. TOUCHDOWN.

These were a little spicy, a little sweet and only took about a half hour to make. Though next time I may put the sauce on the side, cause B didn’t love it. “This was delicious; I just prefer my corn plain. I’m a simple guy.” Yea, message received. But I liked it — nay, loved it — so maybe like those choose your own adventure novels, next time he can choose not to use so much, while I choose to drown mine in it. (Or I can make it the same way and have all the corn to myself.)

Either way it goes well with any main dish. I served it alongside a salad with veggie burger on top, which made me feel like I was poolside, at a summer barbecue. Soon enough, right?!

I swear I saw tears in B’s eyes as he chowed down on his marinated shrimp and green beans last night. He was in love! Or maybe he’s still in disbelief that such a gorgeous woman is cooking him such delicious meals? Ah, they were probably tears from the heat; this sauce is not for the faint of heart. It’s got kick that leaves fire on your lips and tongue — in a good way, that makes you want to keep going, licking every last drop off your fingers. You can tone it down if you like by adding more brown sugar and ketchup — but why ruin all the fun?

Chrissy Teigen says it’s still the most searched/most talked about recipe on her blog, even though she posted it back in August of 2011. And homegirl’s got a pretty serious arsenal of recipes. Anyway she suggested making enough to freeze for later, so I decided to make a jar of it since I already had all the ingredients. I’m going away with my girls this weekend so I’ll bring it with me and use it when I make that mexican salad with shrimp on top. So the recipe below is for one serving (enough to coat whatever fish or meat you choose, for two-three people) but if you’d like to follow my (and Chrissy’s) lead — just quadruple the servings.

I’m all about homemade sauces and dressings, because they are so much healthier. The ones you buy in a store — even the “healthy” ones — are loaded with so much sugar and salt. Homemade tastes so much better, too. I just whipped up a jar of my super secret spicy dressing last night that I’m also bringing with me this weekend to feed my girls; I’ll share that recipe with you when I get back. So stay tuned. Let’s be done with store-bought sauces and dressings!

There were plenty of other exciting flavors in the meal — starting with the chile-lime cashews — and followed by the delicious mango, cucumber, jicama salad, which I’m going to post tomorrow. Stay tuned for that recipe — and others! — there are still 3 more parts to this Mexican fiesta dinner party extravaganza.

PS: another reason to make your own guac at home — Grub Street says you’re shelling out big $$$ for it at your fave Mexican joint.